We'll See

I met a guy. I've met lots of guys but none worth my time. But this guy is different. I think. We'll see...

We met a few weeks ago online and have talked and texted and FaceTimed but hadn't met in person. He came on strong and it made me wary because we hadn't met in person and I questioned his intentions.

Since then we've met in person and gone out a few times and we definitely click. He's introduced me to a couple friends and he invited me to his birthday thing next weekend in Austin with his friends. I'm having a get together tomorrow and he's supposed to come. We'll see. He says he's all in. He says he knows I've been through hell and back and he's not here to hurt me. We'll see.

So far I like what I see. He calls me every morning and night and we text throughout the day. He's not afraid to talk about things: issues in past relationships, what he wants in the future, issues with the kids. I'm starting to think he's for real and not just playing games but we'll see.

I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. I keep thinking I'm an easy target bc I'm a young widow, like I'm a conquest to be had. I hope and pray that's not the case and that he sticks around. He says he's not going anywhere. We'll see.

My best friend said it's really rare to find love right off the bat and you might have to kiss a few frogs before finding it again but don't let that keep you from trying. Maybe he's not my forever, maybe he's my for now of for however long this season is. I'm trying to go with it and not drag my feet out of fear. It's hard bc it's so scary. I'm afraid to give my heart away and have it broken again. But I guess if I could survive the heartbreak of losing my sweet husband I can survive a breakup. We'll see.

My wise 13 year old said, "Don't break his trust by going on dates with anyone else because he seems like a good guy but guard your heart a little bit until you know for sure." Smart kid. I did that (proud momma moment). So that's what I'm doing. Here we go. We'll see how it goes.