Rejoice!

The bible says rejoice in your sufferings (Rom 5:3-5). That means you WILL suffer but REJOICE, push yourself forward with endurance to run the race before you, be graceful and gracious,  and find joy in each day because it's there. There's still love to this life and still a purpose for us who are left behind. There's still joy but we can't see it if we go through each day with our heads hanging down.

It seems unnatural at first but it truly helps to take a deep breath, maybe say a prayer, and just do it. That's what I have to do. There are days, especially at the very beginning, when I just want to lie in bed with the covers over my head and cry. I don't want to face my new reality or the world. In those moments I say a simple prayer, "God move my feet because I don't want to move." Then I take a deep breath, put my feet on the ground, and get out of bed! If He can make the sun stand still and move mountains, He can move me. He gives you the strength to move, one step at a time, one obstacle at a time. These days taking a shower and fixing my hair is an obstacle sometimes because I just want to sulk alone like the crazy Miss Havisham. But I dont (most days). I get up and move.

Go to the gym. Go for a walk. Go back to work. Volunteer somewhere. Be around kids, they have a way of bringing out smiles (as long as you can give em back, ha!). Keep your love close and talk about the good times, focus on their life and honor their memory instead of focusing on the loss. At least that's what I'm doing.

Love is not a feeling, love is a verb...an action. It's the conscious choice to put the other one first even when you're pissed at them. If grief is an extension of love you have to make a conscious choice in how you grieve too. Does that make sense? Grieving long and hard doesn't mean you love the person any more and having a good day(s) doesn't mean you love them any less. It means you're living, loving them and getting through each day with your head up. How else will you be able to see the beauty that still surrounds you?

Today that beauty will be found on the faces of family and friends at a baby's birthday party. Today I'm going to celebrate their new life and the joy we share in these moments. Today I will hold my love close to my heart, breathe when I'm overcome with emotion, & share these moments with him as he looks on from Heaven. Today I will cry if I need to cry, lean on family, & lean into God. Today will be a beautiful day and I will rejoice.